Saturday, June 25, 2011

The Great Coon Removal

As I was getting ready for work yesterday morning, I heard Diesel going crazy in the yard.  Usually, it means either the cat is near the fence or someone has his toy.  I went to the backdoor to see what the commotion was all about.  He was barking up at a tree.  I thought maybe Miss Kitty was up it or another cat.  They've done it once before but it usually only takes once to learn the yard is not a favorable area.  I looked up in the tree and saw a raccoon.  Ugh.  I didn't have time for this.  I told Diesel to leave it alone.  He didn't want any part of it.  I finished getting ready and left.

I was hoping during the heat of the day, when the dogs go under the porch to stay cool, the coon would make a quick departure.  I called the Husband on my way home to see if he had seen it before leaving for work.  He said he didn't know anything about it.  The dogs acted normal when he left.  Good, I thought, the coon must have made it out.

Unfortunately, that did not occur.  When I pulled up the drive, Diesel and Lucky were under the tree.  I knew the coon was still there.  It was going on 12 hours since I had seen it there.  No tellin' how much longer it had been there before I found it.  I had to do something about it.

First I got the dogs out of the yard.  I put them in the stock trailer and left the yard gate open.  I hoped once the dogs were out of the area, the raccoon would decide to leave.  After watching from inside the house, I realized this was not working.

Then I looked online to see what a raccoon would eat.  It said nuts, berries, pretty much anything and peanut butter.  So I put some peanut butter on a piece of bread and put it lower in the tree.  Surely, this would entice it to come down.  And I waited.....nope.

By this time, I called the Husband to inform him the coon was still here.  We discussed some options and I told him I would try water.  So I put the nozzle on the hose and sprayed the coon.  I think he was just enjoying the pleasant cold water.  I'm sure it was a welcomed relief after sitting in the top of the tree all day in the 100 degree weather.  He didn't budge.

Okay, at this point I started throwing things at it in the tree.  Not the best idea since the stuff got caught in the branches!

Next bright idea, get the ladder and sorting stick.  Yep, I hauled the ladder out of the barn to the tree.  Took my sorting stick and poked the sucker.  Well, that just made him mad and bite the stick.  I envisioned him scurrying down that stick and eatin' my face off.  About this time, the Husband calls for an update.  I advise him I'm on a ladder jabbin' the monster with a stick.  He's (the Husband) not real happy since I'm the biggest klutz in the area.  He asked me to please not fall off the ladder.  Yea, I'll try not to.

I'm gettin' pretty perturbed with the situation.  I have given this dang thing every opportunity to leave my tree in a nice orderly fashion and he's snubbed his nose at me.  I pull out the next best thing, the hot shot.  So now I'm on top of the ladder with the hot shot trying to teach this bad boy a lesson.  But instead of going down the tree, he just goes around the top of the tree.  Like an idiot, I chase him.  Moving the ladder to each side, climbing up, giving him a shock, climbing down, moving it around.  I wore myself out.

The Husband calls again for another update.  I tell him the situation has not changed.  We're just both a little more pissy than before.  I don't want to shoot the stupid thing but he needs to get out of my tree!  Well we decide on the next best thing, I'll shoot it with rat shot.  That will surely get it down.

So I head outside with the .22 rifle.  Take aim as best I can thru all the branches and shoot.  At first I didn't even think I really hit it.  But then, it fell out of the tree....DEAD.  All that effort to keep from killing it and I killed it anyhow.

The Husband couldn't believe that the rat shot did it in.  I told him I'm just a dead eye.  Now he's calling me Davy Crockett.  He asked if I was gonna skin it out for a hat.  I told him well, no, it would be full of holes!

I'm hoping no other coons try to take their chance in our yard.  They won't get as many chances next time!

19 comments:

fernvalley01 said...

Wow! I don't know quite what to say!Sounds like you gave it every chance .Note to self , no not make Kit anngry!sounds like a heck of a shot

Nikker said...

Yikes! Those critters are nastey!
My hubby shot one with the .22 (not such a dead eye...) and the dang thing crashed off of the roof and came at us! OMG, we were screaming like a couple of little girls running to the house...we did get a bigger gun, and finish the little creep.
Great story!!!

Tammy said...

Bulls-eye! Heckuva shot!

Just a thought... Are raccoons prone to rabies? For some reason, I don't think they are like a skunk would be, but just wondering about its perseverance in this episode....

Mikey said...

OH my goodness! I burst into laughter at your husband saying "Please don't fall off the ladder".
Well, you gave that critter every chance in the book, and maybe he was rabid... you never know. What a situation though!! Never a dull moment at your place...

Reddirt Woman said...

Now knowing what a dead eye you are the hubs will be sure to call each time he comes up the driveway late at night. Better a phone call than rat shot in the booty!

You gave that rascal every chance to vacate your tree and property. Besides as hot and dry as it has been you don't know if it might be rabid... except rabid usually attack. Better safe for you and the dogs this way.

Gail said...

Next time, shoot first and ask questions later.

Glad you had no accidents.

LindaG said...

Wow. Congratulations on a great shot. It's just as well.
Happy Sunday to you!

Denisarita said...

That scenerio happens here frequently. Next time, lock the dogs up in the garage, kennel, or trailer overnight. The coon will be gone in the morning. They are night critters. Also, they are fierce! If the dog is bitten it can result in a nasty infection. But on the bright side, who knew you were such a crack shot!

Muddy Boot Dreams said...

All I can say is will you please get your self over here and dispose of a few of them for us.

We now have two vying for territory when the sun hits dinner time. What happened to nocturnal? They are out all day, and this is in the middle of the city.

I worry for our cats, since they have no idea how dangerous the raccoons are. The neighbors cats like to snuggle right up to it.

And we have small children running around in this area. So Annie, get your gun and hop on a plane, please!!!!

Jen @ Muddy Boot Dreams

small farm girl said...

I was laughing so hard reading this. Then I had to read it to the Hubby. LOL!!!! Thanks for making my day.

martina said...

Maybe we should call you Quick Draw or Annie Oakley!
Raccoons are very prone to rabies-do you think this one may have had it?

Ranch Girl Diaries said...

Nice shot! ;-) Raccoons are such a nuisance, they love to get into the garbage cans around here, I've heard them toss them around and actually try to pry them open at night. I have a couple that live in (or at least climb about in) a tree on my patio. The thing that freaks me out is they aren't very shy. They just stare at almost you drunkly and might amble away.

Foxterriermom said...

Pictures or it didn't happen!

Nicole said...

Things like this always seem to happen when you are home by yourself, but good shot!

Stephanie said...

AHHAA. Laughed so hard....this is just something I would do trying everything to save the blasted thing and wind up kiling it myself. Good thing it got you ticked off first or - if like me - you would have cried that you shot it out of the tree!!!

Janet Phillips said...

hahaha....that is so like all my dog / critter stories. You are a lot nicer than I am cause I would have just pulled the gun out at first and just shot the little guy, but then I would have most likely not killed him since I wanted to....lol

Farmchick said...

lol--great story. :) Racoons can be very mean!! Come on over for a visit and say hi!!

Reddunappy said...

Good shot! LOL
We too have racoon problems now and then. Yes we do shoot them. The last one kept waking us up in the middle of the night on our back deck, trying to get into the garbage can that the dog food is in.
I had a wildlife officer tell me that around here the racoons have distemper. Distemper is very nasty in people if you get bit by a sick racoon! We dont have Rabies to much around here, bats most commonly.
Racoons are bad news! To many people around here think they are cute and feed them!!

Cory Johnson said...

too funny! Reminds me of my adventures with the skunk!