The Silver Bullet

I must tell you about the husband and his vehicle, the Silver Bullet. But first, let me give you the background story.

The husband bought a brand new pickup last year. It is very nice, however, he took a job about an hour and a half away from the house. When fuel prices started to soar, he decided he needed to buy a small car being it was the most affordable option at the time. One day, as I sat at my desk, he called and asked me to search the internet for a Kia Spectra. Which I did and he wanted to know what it looked like. Well, a regular 'ol car I said, why? He had found one at a local dealership and thought he would buy it.

A day or so later, he asked me if I could drive him into town so he could sign the paperwork and pick up the car. You really bought the car, sight unseen?? Oh my. I could never do that but the husband, not a problem for him. He had arranged for our banker to have the paperwork ready so all he had to do was pick up the car and take the signed papers back to the bank.

We get to the dealership bright and early. Go in and get the keys. We walk outside and this is what we see.....

Not a Kia Spectra but a Kia Spectra5. Not the same color they said, not the same options. Totally different car than the one he thought he was buying. We both looked at each other and said this can't be the car. The sales guy comes out and says, "whatcha think?" The husband said, "This isn't what I was told over the phone." Of course, we got the "oh yeah? Humm, this is what we discussed. Maybe you just misunderstood me or something." The sales guy left and I stood there in awe. I finally blurted out, "Damn, this is ugly!" I couldn't believe my bullrider of a husband was now the proud owner of a hatchback!

Over a year later, he has driven the tires off the little sucker. It gets him where he needs to go and doesn't cost us an arm and a leg in fuel so it's served its purpose. But Monday, he and the Silver Bullet had close call. On my way home from class, I spoke with him on the phone. It went something like this....

H: "I wrecked my car tonight."

W: "WHAT!! What do you mean you wrecked your car tonight?"

H: "On the way home from work, I hit a raccoon. And it tore my car up."

W: "A raccoon? What did a raccoon do to your car?"

H: "It busted the fog light casing. And tore the front end up. I had to stop and pull the fender out too."

W: "WHAT!"

H: "I pulled over but it was dark. So I went to the truck stop. Had to buy some zip ties to fix the bumper."

W: (laughing hysterically) "You zip tied your car together! That must have been like a super strength raccoon!"

H: "Well, when your car is only about 2 inches off the ground, it doesn't take a very big animal to tear it up."

When I got home that night, I shined my truck lights on his car. Sure enough, zip ties holding the bumper together. I laughed again.

The next day I asked the husband how the car was doing. He said he thought the zip ties were doing a great job and reinforced it quite well. Then yesterday he gets home and tells me he hit another raccoon. Another one??? Yep, but this time it only busted one of the zip ties. Those zip ties really did reinforce the front end of the car!

Maybe for Christmas, I can have a grill guard specially made for the Silver Bullet. However, by that time, the husband may have killed all the raccoons in the area. I'll just make sure we stay fully stocked on zip ties.